I Did Frankly Forgive Them

I Did Frankly Forgive Them

Nephi’s example of discipleship is impressive in a variety of dimensions, but none more so than outside Jerusalem while returning to the family camp in the wilderness with Ishmael and his family. The setting is Nephi and his brothers have been sent to convince Ishmael to join Lehi and his family in the wilderness. As we learn later, Ishmael just happened to have enough daughters for all the sons of Lehi and Zoram to marry. This time, for some reason, there was no complaining on the part of Laman and Lemuel, until they were returning to the wilderness camp. At this point “Laman and Lemuel, and two of the daughters of Ishmael, and the two sons of Ishmael and their families, did rebel against” Nephi (1 Nephi 7:6.) They wanted to return to Jerusalem.

At this point “Nephi, being grieved for the hardness of their hearts...spake unto them” (1 Nephi 7:8.) Nephi is not known for subtlety, and this event was certainly no exception. He asked them some pointed questions in rapid fire (see http://www.themostcorrectbook.org/2019/05/question-shall-we-not-be-diligent-in.html for more details on this exchange). In response, Laman and Lemuel skipped the mocking phase of murmuring, “they were angry with” him. Their anger immediately turned to violence as they tied up Nephi “that they might leave [him] in the wilderness to be devoured by wild beasts” (1 Nephi 7:16.) Nephi then prays for strength to burst these bands with which [he was] bound and his petition is granted, allowing him to stand in front of his brethren to speak “unto them again” (1 Nephi 7:17-18.)

As usual, “they were angry with [Nephi] again, and sought to lay hands upon [him]; but behold, one of the daughters of Ishmael, yea, and also her mother, and one of the sons of Ishmael, did plead with [his] brethren, insomuch that they did soften their hearts; and they did cease striving to take away [Nephi’s] life” (1 Nephi 7:19.)

Here is where the story gets interesting. In response to the petition in Nephi’s behalf,  Laman and Lemuel suddenly “were sorrowful, because of their wickedness, insomuch that they did bow down before [Nephi], and did plead with [him] that [he] would forgive them of the thing that they had done against” him (1 Nephi 7:20.) Their violence had quickly turned to groveling at Nephi’s feet.

Imagine yourself as Nephi at this point. You have been enduring your brothers’ murmuring for weeks, if not months, or even longer. Their murmuring has included mocking, anger, and violence toward you and others you love. They have just made at least the second attempt on your life. Now, suddenly, they are sorry and asking for forgiveness? Do you believe them? Is this a trick? Are they really sincere? Is there any possibility that they are just trying to win favor with their future mother-in-law who had plead in your behalf? What happens next is one of the most powerful and inspiring examples of discipleship in all of holy writ.

In Nephi's language, “And it came to pass that I did frankly forgive them all that they had done, and I did exhort them that they would pray unto the Lord their God for forgiveness.” What!? No lecture, no sarcasm, no cool and calculated response in case this was a trick? No, Nephi “did frankly forgive them.” Not just this one horrific example of violence, like so many others, but he “did frankly forgive them all that they had done”! All the mocking, and anger, and violence Nephi had ever experienced was included in one magnificent act of forgiveness. As if this was not exemplary enough, he also deflected their adoration of him to where it rightly belonged - to God. Therefore, he did “exhort them that they would pray unto the Lord their God for forgiveness” (1 Nephi 7:21.) How did Laman and Lemuel react to Nephi’s forgiveness and instructions? “And it came to pass that they did so. And after they had done praying unto the Lord we did again travel on our journey towards the tent of our father.”

Every time I have read this story I am amazed at Nephi’s strength and goodness to forgive. The precept to be derived from this piece of Book of Mormon history is the importance and power of forgiveness. This is a precept with which I have struggled as a disciple. There have been times in my life when others have been unkind, sometimes mocking me and my faith, times when others have been angry toward me, and a few time when that anger has turned to violence. I confess, early in my discipleship I struggled with the command that I forgive others (Matthew 6:12-15), particularly when others were trying to do me or my loved ones harm. However, as I have read again and again about Nephi’s example I have found it increasingly hard to withhold forgiveness from another. As I write this and consider all the people I know, I can honestly say that I do not hold malice toward anyone. This is simply miraculous for me. My tendency when I was young was to harbor ill feelings toward others who had wronged me and sometimes seek revenge. Nephi’s example has stirred me to reach for God’s grace and has helped me to change. As I have learned to abide the precept of forgiving others I have drawn nearer to God. He has replaced the malice with peace as I have forgiven others.